ready for abduction

Guyz, I think I might be a prude. It might just be me, but it seems like the radio has gotten ridiculously sexually explicit in the past few months.

I’m not talking about Rihanna’s “S&M” (because that rocks my socks off, you go girl!), I’m talking about Jeremih & 50 cent’s “Down on Me” and Katy Perry & Kayne West’s “E.T.” (and not just because E.T. sounds too much like Tatu’s “All the things she said”)

Now, I’m not generally bothered by explicit song lyrics (come on, it’s not like I haven’t had the seks) and I’m not worry about the kidz hearing them and running off to get teenage pregnant. But I honestly wonder if all this is really necessary to sell a song, and additionally, does it have to be SO degrading to women? Why not sing about having mutually awesome, fireworks exploding, opera lady singing seks instead of how “If I do not fit, I’m gonna make it girl, you can take it, don’t stop, get it, get it.”

The overall gist of E.T. is really more an expression of submissive seks than it is degrading, which is fine, but my problems are with Kayne’s interlude.

I know a bar out in mars
Where they driving spaceships instead of cars
Cop a prada space suit about the stars
Getting stupid hah straight up out the jars
Pockets on shrek, rockets on deck
Tell me whats next? Alien sex.
Imma disrobe you, then Imma probe you
See I abducted you
So I tell you what to do

Really? “I tell ya what to do”? Necessary? No. It’s not. I could do without this part of the song.

I don’t really know if I even want to justify Jeremih and 50 Cent’s ridiculous lyrics, but I also want to rip them apart so here’s a nugget. Italics mine.

She want it, I can tell she want it
Really? You could tell she wanted it? That’ll be an awesome rape defense.
Want me to push up on it ‘fore she know when I’m all on it
That’s right. Get her when she’s least expecting it.

Girl, you got that secret treasure, I’m gonna put that lock on it
Um. A chastity belt?
Don’t care what they say, I would be stupid to be not on it
Unless what “they” say is “she doesn’t want to have sex with you”.
Heard you go that sticky
Glad to hear that “sticky” is the new “va jay jay”
Lets go and take 9 shots, we’ll just call it fifty
This doesn’t even make sense.
And I’m gonna lick it, lick it, lick it
At least you’re not expecting her to do all the work.
Till her hicky have her Rev running
Again, no.
Keep you running ‘til you whimpy, bang, bang, bang, bang
Add Murder 1 to that.

and I think this might be my favorite line…

Say you independent, get it from your momma
Tell me if you with it, do you really wanna?
Translation: “Oh, you’re a feminist? Was your mother also interested in women’s liberation? Are you still interested in having consensual sex? Remember you can say no at any time and I will totally respect that.”

Give me a break, music industry. We’re smarter than that. And if we’re not, we aren’t really qualified to operate a radio.